Anna Lei





It smells like China outside my dorm, which is interesting because people are smoking outside my dorm.

I just described the visual aspects of male genitalia in my lit paper.

I just achieved a couple of milestones. 1. I ran. To all the haters who think I only can run while drunk (myself included)...fuq u. 2. I ran across a BRIDGE. This is clearly much more groundbreaking for me. I am a conquistador.

Chinese people eat everything. I've seen a Chinese person eat a cocoon

Did you go running at 1 AM and get injected in the neck with a needle?

Jusss so you know, I am currently charging my iTouch. And let me just tell you that the process is laborious.

I feel that last arbitrary sentence heightens the comedy in the fact that my parents are tickled by my loud and obtrusive and sometimes abusive behavior towards you. We are the Heathcliff and Catherine of the 21st century—minus the intoxicating and toxic romance leading to a dark abyss of mutual demiseeee! That would be tragic, but just slightly. Actually, in retrospect, I'd probs find it comical given that I have a dark sense of humor 5/7 of the week. Ok, this tangent is over

It's a good thing you're wearing your glasses. I don't punch people in glasses. You better hope you start your period soon cuz I know how much it pains you to wear your glasses.

You cut out the porn in our genetics vid!!!!

Remember, as far as anyone knows, we are a NICE and NORMAL family.

Avant-garde poetry performance. Yes. It's spose to be sex.

Always trust people who like big butts. They cannot lie.

In the form of my people I will write you a love haiku. ~~
Jared I love you
You are truly beautiful
Will you marry me

In dire need of some mustachinnn around blooopz

Man you are giving my immune system a test. I can just feel from my throat an internal battle between the macrophages and the viral particles you are spewing in my general direction. Stop laughing. The more you laugh the worse it gets for me.

This dog came and sat on our blanket yesterday at the beach. So blessed and fortuitous.

I am a constant hazard
to myself


Whenever I'm down in the dumps slash stressed. I read shit Joe Biden sayz and it cheerz me up. I love that man
I mean, it's not like he's on a warpath against the active voice, like this man is.

I am overly invested in the Titanic. Yes.


Weather outside is BEAUTIFUL today. I think I'll go for a run. I won't do it, but I'll think it.

This dude playing 2 Chainz early as hell in the morning. Damn it.

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Facebook ruined my lyfe

Michael likes this wallpost. Ethan likes your status. Carrie commented on that photo. Kevin blocked you.




Biggie Shirt


I'm wearing a shirt and it makes me feel like Biggie Smalls. I've always wondered what the sound of metal pushing through flesh does to one's hypothalamus. Biggie Biggie Biggie can't you see, sometimes your words just hypnotize me. I bet he knows. The shirt is so massive I don't know where the beginning ends and where the end begins. Folds on folds on folds. I'm getting claustrophobic between the creases. The shirt is expanding into a hot air balloon. I'm shooting all the birds swooping past. I'm a mother-effing sniper. In this shirt I feel like the most power manager in all the Targets across America. It's true. Biden confirmed it. That man knows what's up. Joe Biden shot the man in the wheelchair. Joe Biden shot Tobias Funke. Joe Biden shot Biggie Smalls. Everything is blue in some way or another. Except my shirt. My shirt is the color of skin just before a bullet slams. Today, I'm feeling generous. Here's a ring pop!




I tried to Carpe Diem, but I failed. Miserably.


The battle between the macrophages and viral particles in my throat is getting serious. The children in scratchy wolf costumes are laughing and raking the walls of my lungs with silver forks. My head. A black sea full of sharks and trinkets disposed. Flumes of red flow from my eyes. The conjunctiva is exposed to bacteria and other irritations. Tearaways help protect the conjunctiva by washout away bacteria. Tearaways also contain eons and anticlimaxes that killer bacteria. The conjunctiva is exposed to bacteria and other islands. Teardrops help protect the conjunctiva by washroom away bacteria. Teardrops also contain epaulets and anticyclones that killing bacteria. The conjunctiva is exposed to bacteria and other islanders. Tear-jerkers help protect the conjunctiva by washstand away bacteria. Tear-jerkers also contain epics and antidotes that killjoy bacteria. The conjunctiva is exposed to bacteria and other isles. Teases help protect the conjunctiva by wasp away bacteria. Teases also contain epicentres and antigens that kiln bacteria. The conjunctiva is exposed to bacteria and other islets. Teasels help protect the conjunctiva by waste away bacteria. Teasels also contain epicures and antiheros that kilo bacteria. The conjunctiva is exposed to bacteria and other isolations. Teasers help protect the conjunctiva by wastebasket away bacteria. Teasers also contain epidemics and antihistamines that kilogram bacteria. The conjunctiva is exposed to bacteria and other isometrics. Teaspoons help protect the conjunctiva by wasteland away bacteria. Teaspoons also contain epiglottiss and antimacassars that kilometre bacteria. Don't. Touch. Me.

Don't laugh don't cry don't breathe.

It's 10 and oh up in this joint and I'm about ready to self-combust into the fireworks you wish you saw. Bluegreenpurplepink silver explodeexploding in the frigid night air. My heart. Explodeexploding in the swamp that is me. I'm full of dirty creatures and pink crocodiles. Please pierce into my chest. Cut the bodies squirming and squiggling and consuming. My face is crumbling and peeling like towers burning. My body a tower. Now, a pile of ash on the ground. Children stomp and swirl in blackness. Stomp stomp stomp.


My head is protruding from my eyes. My eyes swimming in my veins. My veins dissssssssssssssoooooooolllllllllllvvvvvvvvvvvvvvving. My organs are all drunk off of cocaine.

In this state, nothing can be done.